“Don’t you find it odd,” she continued, “that when you’re a kid, everyone, all the world, encourages you to follow your dreams. But when you’re older, somehow they act offended if you even try.”
I didn’t think I was that much of a “judgy” person but I certainly caught myself right in the act yesterday. I went all sorts of “Judge Judy” on a lady walking along the busy street near where I live. I wasn’t sitting behind a bench wearing a gown with a lacy collar but I may as well have been. I was safely tucked behind the steering wheel of my car driving along hurling “judgy” thoughts at this poor lady. It was a rainy day and she was wearing a myriad of questionable fashion choices (more “judgyness” on my part) but the crown of flowers in her hair was what really made me wonder “Why is she walking along in the rain with all those flowers in her hair? Who does that? Isn’t she a bit too old for that?” Like the raindrops splattering on my windshield, there was a barrage of rapid-fire “judgy” thoughts landing on this lady just walking along the sidewalk.
Then, in an instance, there was a break in my deluge of negative thoughts. Who wears a crown of flowers? She obviously does and good for her! Why not? Flowers are very beautiful so why not beautify your hair with them? I realized at that moment that I had never worn flowers in my hair. This lady was doing it on a random weekday along a busy stretch of road. At that moment, I added, “Wear flowers in my hair” to my list. Not to my bucket list though. I understand bucket lists are very grandiose for some folks: visit the Eiffel Tower, sky dive, take a safari in Africa etc. Many of us have that list of big experiences we want to have before we give the bucket a kick. What I am talking about here is less grandiose. It’s that list that you keep a little closer to the inner layer of your onion. I may be out on a limb but I don’t think I am the only one with such a list.
When I say I added “Wear flowers in my hair,” it wasn’t as though I broke out a notebook and penciled it in. Writing it here seems a bit silly but if I share a few items from my list, you readers can share your-not-exactly-bucket-list list. Who knows but maybe in sharing them we can make them happen or have a good laugh at the quirky “crown of flowers” that we all might be wishing for. Here’s just a few of the items from my growing list of things not quite right for the bucket list and I am sure will stir up some “judgy” thoughts along the lines of “What is she thinking?” and “Isn’t she too old for that?” Or maybe you’ll look past the randomness and you’ll admit to all kinds of experiences yet to be had for you. So here goes.
- I’d like to be a movie extra. Ideally, a storm trooper type thing. I don’t want lines. I just want to be able to point out to my mom “Look that’s me! The second one from the left in the third row of troopers” or to see myself running through the death star after an alarm has been sounded.
- I want to memorize and “perform” a rap song (a long one along the lines of “Rapper’s Delight”) and by perform – I mean bust it out at the dinner table when nobody sees it coming. Nobody would ever see that coming.
- I am hoping someone will let me enter his or her dog in a dog show. I want to run around in a nice dress suit while wearing huge sneakers and probably a knee brace – because that’s what the lady handlers seem to wear.
- A small physical altercation of some kind. But hear me out! There are a few conditions. Only if I can win it and the person really had it coming like they messed with my mom or made fun of my crown of flowers. I’d like to get in a good punch, slap, or South Pole kick before I am whisked off to safety so I don’t do too much damage.
- A handstand. I was way too grounded as a child. I need to get some handstands in! I’m working on this!
The list could continue. There is a lot more. I haven’t scratched the surface but now it’s your turn. Maybe you’ve been worried about being judged or you just never thought to say it aloud. What’s on your list? I promise I won’t bust out my “Judge Judy” doily collar on you.